Shopping Cart
Your Cart is Empty
Quantity:
Subtotal
Taxes
Shipping
Total
There was an error with PayPalClick here to try again

Carol Grigg Counselling
Carol Grigg Counselling
Share your untold story
My Blog
Blog
Some seem to have it covered
Posted on April 2, 2016 at 8:13 AM |
In my counselling and
personal experience I’ve begun to be aware of a subset of AS partners who
perform very highly in the job description of partner as though they must be
applying themselves to it as a special interest. We’ve heard of some who’ve made their partner
their special interest (long-term) with a high level of adulation and attention
(maybe stifling) but still don’t connect emotionally in any consistent way, but
I hadn’t focused previously on some who actually make it their business to be
the best partner anyone can have, leaving no grounds for anyone to fault
them. They have it covered. Except the partner still feels so alone and
emotionally empty. Many practical and
physical needs are well catered for, solutions are swiftly provided to meet any
difficulty, but the partner still feels invisible as an actual soul with
feelings and emotional needs. The performance may be flawless, but it’s
still superficial, just ticking the boxes, like making moves on a chess
board. Very deliberately it would
seem. Partners report feeling like their
partner heads them off at the pass constantly. Like all their needs have been
analysed and predicted, with solutions applied before they can even think let
alone open their mouths to ask. And how
dare they ask or have a need that hasn’t been catered for already. Maybe there are other factors in these
situations. There’s an awareness and a
capacity to perform that many Aspies don’t seem to have, but nevertheless I’ve
heard it enough now to want to include it in what I write about. Emotional intimacy, closeness and connection
are still missing, but most other bases are covered in a way that leaves no
ground for complaint. A great deal of
intelligence is being applied here. In a couple of these
situations the relationship has actually been ended by the AS partner when the
non-AS partner persisted in asking for emotional intimacy and change, or
questioning the AS partner’s performance in any way. Seems the preferred path may be to leave
rather than acknowledge an inadequacy or a need that he/she has no solution
for. |
Categories: Asperger's Syndrome in Relationships
Post a Comment
Oops!
The words you entered did not match the given text. Please try again.
0 Comments
Loading...
/
Oops!
Oops, you forgot something.