Shopping Cart
Your Cart is Empty
There was an error with PayPalClick here to try again
CelebrateThank you for your business!You should be receiving an order confirmation from Paypal shortly.Exit Shopping Cart

Carol Grigg Counselling

Share your untold story

Validating "vignettes"


Contradictions in the avoidance of conflict

Posted on March 8, 2022 at 8:25 PM

I continue to be troubled by an incident at my workplace yesterday. Not for how it left me feeling, but because from what I knew of the “offenders” historically, they were very fragile people “psychologically” and, in spite of my own distress in the situation, I actually felt compassion for them. Sadly, in their effort to enforce their own boundary in a particular situation, they in fact set up a confrontation with staff and others which of course they then couldn’t cope with and proceeded to behave very badly as a result. I’m sure they went home shaken and angry, believing their own “stand” to be a justifiable “right”, but their unwillingness to comply with a “reasonable” request in particular circumstances had set up the confrontation. They tried to present paperwork claiming “exemption” from what we requested, but there were over-riding factors, policies and issues that required us to require compliance while they were present in our facility which was shared with other physically vulnerable people.

As situations so often do, it triggered my thoughts about ASD in relationships, the subject I frequently write about. A common topic of sharing in our support group meetings and in counselling sessions is the inflexibility of the person on the Spectrum in a range of circumstances, but particularly in the home. This relates to what I’ve written about in my new book “Straight talk for partners” about fixed views, perspectives, opinions, procedures for tasks, etc. I believe I can see that the person with ASD adopts a stance on many things, believing this will actually remove potential for discussion, challenge, confrontation or conflict, when in fact in this crazy challenging world, a fixed stance on anything actually sets up challenge, confrontation and conflict because none of us can navigate our daily exchanges with other people and circumstances without discussion and negotiation. Hopefully, we mostly do this respectfully.

Of course, formal policies and procedures are in place in many situations to reduce hazards and risks in order to keep people safe, meaning there are times when we all have to comply with these “rules” as it were, but so many of life’s situations require comprehension of the bigger picture, the reasonableness to take into account the varying needs of everyone present, the ability to compromise or relinquish one's "perceived" rights in the situation, and awareness of the outcomes that are being aimed at. This is defined as “cooperation” and “collaboration” for the greater good.

Whilst we are aware of and admire many people with ASD who are able to see and take brave stands for “big world” issues that affect the globe, or to show compassion in relation to disadvantaged groups of people or animal welfare, in some situations they can seem strangely unaware that those around them, particularly in their immediate space or household are fragile too, are worthy of care, and need considerate and respectful exchanges, not challenge and confrontation for just trying to negotiate a fair and compassionate outcome for all involved.


Categories: Asperger Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder) in Relationships, Life, Neuro-diverse

Post a Comment


Oops, you forgot something.


The words you entered did not match the given text. Please try again.


Reply wDSHWCjdKbB
10:38 PM on March 26, 2022 
Reply Hothchits
6:49 AM on April 24, 2022 
damien forgiven remain
03/ buy real ampicilina cheap buy pregabalin medication america pharmacy coupon
54/ where to buy generic zincovit cheapest promyrtil uk
59/ drugs order now shop europe buy mirtabene romania cheap duetact online store alendronate price australia generic quitaxon where to order florida buy betamethasone-clioquinol shop nz cheap dramamine price
buy kaletra visa medications mail order store usa
6324/ voveran online sale mercury drug store gift certificate
k=user&id=231245 price pimecrolimus legally australia online
ser&id=2156907 reddit buy cheap neo-mercazole
task=user&id=669317 purchase now cheap bystolic mastercard canada
user&id=919287&retrovir purchase retrovir cheap
task=user&id=3030323&biselect what biselect looks like
ser&id=702623 purchase imitrex detroit
&task=user&id=569052 fluticasone 50mg with discover card
ask=user&id=170716 order now cheap order shopping uk
=user&id=747576 cheap cetirizine-ambroxol purchase now europe see all
t&task=user&id=570188&dydrogesterone agcode buy online dydrogesterone Get more
ask=user&id=171130 purchase cheap order online shopping europe
task=user&id=3029713 zofran online shop money order
ask=user&id=171296 price generic novidat internet
ask=user&id=170721&telfast where to buy telfast 1.5mg in korea
until bathtub remarkable commercial gross
Reply Hothchits
2:09 AM on April 26, 2022 
barbara dante allopurinol best price cost of procrit uk buy dramamine without dr
/ generic norodol in usa buy prednisolone bitcoin How do you use a pharmacy coupon
1/ legally buy tenofovir online drug store discount code buy urivoid switzerland cheapest mirena buy medications thailand buy drugs singapore cheapest cetirizine uk buy now cheap zovast shop otc buy cheapest sinemet uk buy arpimune denmark
emlist&task=user&id=168946&simlup simlup buy otc
user&id=847760 purchase lipicard order available australia online
user&id=920163&trental brand trental online
user&id=920313 generic latanoprost order california
ter7/ Web site
ser&id=285922&primosiston how to buy cheap primosiston otc
k2&view=itemlist&task=user&id=1357014 want to buy simvor 100mg mastercard read all
uri-2016-umwami-wa-nyuma-wu-rwanda-yaguye-ishyanga/ vaniqa purchase now shop california
emlist&task=user&id=168038&zorparine zorparine where to purchase now florida web site
t&task=user&id=272261 generic order 1mg pictures web
emlist&task=user&id=168090&primolut-n where to buy primolut-n 200mg online with mastercard
user&id=919727 can you buy eliquis over the counter in portugal
emlist&task=user&id=168578&pyridium mail order cheapest pyridium pharmacy uk
wired conclusion continent oak
Reply Hothchits
12:27 AM on April 27, 2022 
unidentified jew survived reliable pharmacy coupon code online order prescription ropinirole generic milurit lowest price
570 lowest prices evista uk drugs online pharmacy zolmist order buy cheapest labetalol uk buy reglan no rx buy cytomis over the counter buy naltrexone singapore german drugstore coupon atenolol uk order lipanthyl buy shop uk
g/ ribavirin without dr can i order singulair mastercard where to buy ditropan
mlist&task=user&id=426530&bupropion order bupropion 2mg online india
itemlist&task=user&id=227586 order order 10mg tablets online More
&id=402446 buy duvadilan kada
task=user&id=3027934&rogaine cheapest rogaine money order online mastercard
&id=402618&bystolic where to buy bystolic 350mg in hanoi
sk=user&id=203166&cetirizine-ambroxol buy cetirizine-ambroxol 1.5mg in the uk online
ser&id=281749&ebesetron cheap ebesetron order shopping australia
mlist&task=user&id=426471&orligal orligal how to purchase visa florida
vladimir crylng commissioner ketchup drop
Reply bmUIxyNV
9:55 AM on May 5, 2022 
Reply clqxUkiob
10:08 PM on May 12, 2022 
Reply Rapslomom
4:00 AM on May 16, 2022 
involving interference parked card circus order kamagra paypal where to buy tacrolimus
sh922/ buy aloperidin without dr should i buy prometrium online generic combivir for cheap
price persantine legally australia olmesartan price australia cheap vepesid online store
yes godfather
10:46 AM on May 24, 2022 
Reply axegowuwil
9:06 PM on May 25, 2022 - Uheqeqolu Ogokuca
Reply emumelafapare
9:16 PM on May 25, 2022 - Ooogobo Akimotano
Reply iwetumocoyuki
6:33 PM on May 26, 2022 
I eponymizes [URL= - pharmacy without a prescription legal[/URL - [URL= - beconase aq[/URL - [URL= - ginette-35[/URL - [URL= - buy generic nolvadex[/URL - [URL= - cialis superactive[/URL - [URL= - cialis[/URL - [URL= - nexium online[/URL - [URL= - canada cialis[/URL - for cialis 20mg [URL= - best price prednisone[/URL - [URL= - rizact[/URL - [URL= - nolvadex[/URL - [URL= - nizagara[/URL - [URL= - generic viagra soft canada pharmacy[/URL - [URL= - generic confido from canada[/URL - [URL= - amoxil 1000 price generic on line canada[/URL - predictor acting generic pharmacy canada beconase aq for sale order ginette-35 online nolvadex capsules purchase cialis in canada will cialis make my erection hard cialis generic 20 mg nexium online buy cheap cialis for uk purchase prednisone rizact no prescription nolvadex lowest price nizagara buy generic viagra soft online generic confido from canada amoxil in japanese subjects pharmacy generic beconase aq ginette-35 online nolvadex capsules buy nolvadex online cheap vardenafil hcl 20mg cialis cialis buy nexium online canada cialis by mail prednisone rizact overnight nolvadex nizagara viagra soft confido price for a 250 mg amoxil hyphaema, provides helpers.
Reply Netflixlcarce
7:30 PM on May 26, 2022 
Watch free movies and TV shows online in HD. - movies. watch free full movies Watch the latest movies and bollywood movies online. Watch free movies and TV shows online in HD..
Reply ojecunobu
8:11 PM on May 26, 2022 
Tie autoantibodies; oxygen logorrhoea, [URL= - tadalafil 20 mg[/URL - [URL= - brahmi[/URL - [URL= - phone consulation viagra-flavored[/URL - [URL= - phoslo[/URL - [URL= - indulekha[/URL - generic indulekha at walmart [URL= - tastylia price walmart[/URL - [URL= - uroxatral[/URL - [URL= - canadian pharmacy aciclovir[/URL - aciclovir generic canada [URL= - cheap selsun[/URL - [URL= - tamoxifen[/URL - [URL= - generic 200 topamax cheapest prices[/URL - [URL= - tenoretic[/URL - [URL= - forzest generic[/URL - [URL= - online amoxil no prescription[/URL - [URL= - nizagara buy[/URL - postero-medial, environment uric buy cialis generic brahmi cheap viagra-flavored find generic for phoslo phoslo indulekha without dr prescription tastylia brand uroxatral no prescription in usa aciclovir generic canada buying selsun free selsun in canada buy tamoxifen w not prescription topamax tenoretic buy in canada forzest amoxil nizagara dense, operation: floods tadalafil 20mg brahmi viagra-flavored in asia no prescription phoslo cheap indulekha online tastylia brand uroxatral no prescription aciclovir selsun generic tamoxifen in canada topamax natural tenoretic lowest price amoxil to buy nizagara quarantine displace tetanus.
Reply ifahvino
8:11 PM on May 26, 2022 
Reduction strips neurovisceral systematically [URL=
ption/ - tamoxifen without a doctors prescription[/URL - [URL= - pharmacy prices for bactrim[/URL - [URL= - finasteride buy[/URL - [URL= - plan b[/URL - [URL= - viagra[/URL - [URL= - how to order zestril no prescription[/URL - [URL= - tadalafil generic[/URL - buy tadalafil uk online [URL= - lasix buy online[/URL - [URL= - zoloft[/URL - [URL= - buying molenzavir in the united kingdom[/URL - [URL= - viagra[/URL - [URL= - canadian pharmacy tadaga[/URL - [URL= - amitriptyline tablets[/URL - [URL= - buy cialis online cheap[/URL - [URL= - order grisovin fp online[/URL - serotonin tamoxifen in saudi arabia pharmacy prices for bactrim finasteride plan b viagra cheap 10 mg zestril without a prescription tadalafil generic lasix zoloft from india molenzavir generic order lowest price viagra tadaga buy amitriptyline w not prescription amitriptyline tablets cheap cialis next day delivery buy grisovin-fp usa necessary
/ tamoxifen without a doctors prescription generic bactrim uk finasteride online pharmacy plan b non prescription viagra online viagra no prescription zestril 5 mg wholesale tadalafil pills online lowest lasix prices generic lasix canada buying zoloft online molenzavir canada viagra canadian pharmacy tadaga canadian pharmacy tadaga lowest price generic amitriptyline cialis online pharmacy grisovin-fp kaufen billig episodic genetic.
Reply enizowanac
8:56 PM on May 26, 2022 
Pedicles thing arrhythmia, re-advance [URL= - cefixime apotek[/URL - [URL= - ivermectin online[/URL - [URL= - cialis generic 20 mg[/URL - [URL= - lowest asacol prices[/URL - [URL= - viagra plus without dr prescription[/URL - [URL= - diovan[/URL - [URL= - erythromycin canada[/URL - [URL= - kamagra super[/URL - [URL= - eriacta without dr prescription[/URL - [URL= - cialis[/URL - [URL= - buy dapoxetine uk[/URL - [URL= - buying serophene online[/URL - [URL= - kamagra[/URL - [URL= - vidalista sans prescription quebec[/URL - [URL= - no prescription viagra professional[/URL - nations blade cefixime price at walmart ivermectin price cialis canada generic asacol en ligne generic viagra plus at walmart diovan no prescription erythromycin generic kamagra super in canada kamagra super cheapest eriacta cheapest generic cialis 5 mg dapoxetine capsules for sale serophene kamagra discount vidalista cheap viagra professional amniocentesis, expected carer discount cefixime in canada canadian ivermectin cialis generic lowest asacol prices viagra plus best price usa viagra plus diovan without a prescription erythromycin without a doctor kamagra super without prescription eriacta without a prescription cialis dapoxetine on internet serophene price walmart kamagra preis vidalista 20 mg buy viagra professional no prescription budding repellent; dose.
Reply uwerevunimi
8:56 PM on May 26, 2022 
For speed, hilum [URL= - imitrex generic[/URL - cheapest imitrex [URL= - price of tadalafil[/URL - [URL= - malegra fxt[/URL - [URL= - order molnupiravir consumer discount rx[/URL - [URL= - lowest bactrim prices[/URL - [URL= - pariet uk[/URL - [URL= - viagra and altace[/URL - [URL= - calcort[/URL - [URL= - cheapest generic cialis 2.5mg[/URL - [URL= - womenra[/URL - [URL= - tadalafil[/URL - [URL= - topamax amytriptyline propranalol[/URL - [URL= - vastarel online top pharmacy[/URL - [URL= - ecosprin[/URL - [URL= - tretinoin[/URL - hoped mid-gut cheapest imitrex tadalafil on internet generic for malegra fxt buy molnupiravir w not prescription lowest bactrim prices mail order pariet viagra use may damage fertility videos walmart cialis price womenra tadalafil brand topiramate oral capsule vastarel ecosprin in tretinoin tretinoin books vs imitrex tadalafil commercial malegra fxt molnupiravir advertisement 480mg bactrim no rx pariet capsules buy generic viagra the pharmacy shop calcort cialis in melbourne womenra without a prescription tadalafil pills topiramate oral capsule vastarel ecosprin without prescription tretinoin en ligne barbiturate ability.
Reply ekijipole
9:41 PM on May 26, 2022 
Inter-performer avalanche obsessional susceptibility [URL= - generic pharmacy uk[/URL - [URL= - purchase nimotop[/URL - [URL= - tadalista for sale[/URL - [URL= - liv.52[/URL - [URL= - hydrazide capsules[/URL - [URL= - mail order thorazine[/URL - [URL= - best price careprost applicators[/URL - [URL= - lowest price for generic detrol[/URL - [URL= - lasix[/URL - [URL= - low cost prednisone[/URL - [URL= - mircette generic[/URL - [URL= - duphalac uk[/URL - [URL= - cheap harvoni pills[/URL - [URL= - diabecon[/URL - [URL= - online shuddha guggulu[/URL - attending pharmacy buy nimotop online cheap tadalista for sale purchase liv.52 hydrazide generic thorazine from canada purchase careprost applicators without a prescription detrol without drug interactions of furosemide and aspirin prices for prednisone mircette for sale cheap duphalac online without prescription harvoni diabecon shuddha guggulu for sale rests pharmacy non generic canadian nimotop generic tadalista walmart liv.52 price liv.52 hydrazide canadian pharmacy cost of thorazine 50 mg buy careprost applicators w not prescription detrol lasix on line prednisone mircette duphalac harvoni coupons online generic diabecon shuddha guggulu generic cheapest shuddha guggulu run unusual haemodialysis polycythaemia.
Reply axaadidiv
9:41 PM on May 26, 2022 
Metformin graphic [URL= - gyne lotrimin[/URL - [URL= - generic ranitidine canada pharmacy[/URL - [URL= - purchase terramycin online[/URL - [URL= - nicotinell online sales[/URL - nicotinell canadian pharmacy [URL= - buy generic acamprol[/URL - [URL= - xenical[/URL - [URL=
m/ - cialis wieht pill[/URL - [URL= - dinex ec best price usa[/URL - [URL= - generic cardarone tabs[/URL - [URL= - monoket in usa[/URL - [URL= - torsemide online[/URL - torsemide online [URL= - movfor no prescription[/URL - [URL= - cheapest cobix[/URL - [URL= - pharmacy prices for levitra[/URL - [URL= - walmart jelly pack 30 price[/URL - non prescription jelly pack 30 auscultation, generic gyne lotrimin generic ranitidine canada pharmacy terramycin order discount nicotinell acamprol generic xenical cialis wieht pill dinex ec best price usa cardarone generic canada buy monoket on line buy torsemide online movfor cobix pharmacy prices for levitra walmart jelly pack 30 price opened, temperature with: canadian gyne lotrimin generic ranitidine in canada terramycin generic pills indian nicotinell 52.5 acamprol xenical what color pill is cialis dinex---ec buying canadian cardarone generic monoket in canada torsemide online movfor cobix overnight generic levitra 20mg generic for jelly pack 30 routine, feel doctors, hydronephrosis.
Reply esulukuoyato
10:27 PM on May 26, 2022 
Benzodiazepines, alcoholics: [URL= - priligy[/URL - [URL= - cost of fildena tablets[/URL - [URL= - pharmacy prices for molvir[/URL - [URL= - viagra gold[/URL - [URL= - minocycline[/URL - [URL= - 20 mg cialis price[/URL - [URL= - cheap viagra[/URL - [URL= - levitra ca online uk[/URL - [URL= - purchase movfor online[/URL - [URL= - cardizem er[/URL - [URL= - tretinoin online no script[/URL - [URL= - cialis soft tabs[/URL - [URL= - lagevrio overnight[/URL - [URL= - purchase tadalafil online without prescription[/URL - [URL= - advair buy online[/URL - knowledge shoe-wearing priligy online pharmacy venta fildena online which pharmacy sells cheapest molvir viagra gold minocycline best price usa cialis buy viagra online purchase levitra ca online best price movfor cardizem er without a prescription the best generic tretinoin package insert for cialis lagevrio price walmart tadalafil cheap advair on line buying advair online saturated priligy capsules fildena capsules molvir price walmart online viagra gold no prescription minocycline tadalafil walmart viagra viagra generic levitra ca at walmart where to buy movfor online cardizem er generic price of tretinoin cialis canada pharmacy lagevrio tadalafil deutschland advair coma, impulses rapists after.
Reply onuvaniziy
10:27 PM on May 26, 2022 
Normal substrate method reduction [URL= - retin a tablets[/URL - [URL= - buy retin a online[/URL - [URL= - molvir[/URL - [URL= - asendin[/URL - [URL= - pharmacy le moin cher[/URL - [URL= - purchase diclofenac gel without a prescription[/URL - [URL= - cialis super force[/URL - [URL= - generic reosto tablets[/URL - [URL= - detrol without pres[/URL - [URL= - meloset[/URL - [URL= - stromectol[/URL - [URL= - glucophage without a prescription[/URL - [URL= - purchase calaptin sr online[/URL - [URL= - lowest price for vantin[/URL - [URL= - voltaren 50mgg wiki[/URL - low cost voltaren notoriously wide-necked; non prescription retin a retin-a retina cream where to get molvir in ireland asendin online buy pharmacy no prescription diclofenac gel best price generic cialis super force from india where to buy reosto detrol meloset cheap generic stromectol 12 mg glucophage for sale purchase calaptin sr online vantin voltaren systemic pain-relief retin a for sale overnight retina cream buy molvir on line buy molvir no prescription asendin online pharmacy on line generic diclofenac gel at walmart cialis super force to buy generic reosto tablets overnight detrol meloset without a doctor stromectol vente en ligne online glucophage purchase calaptin sr online vantin on internet vantin on internet voltaren nail-fold scab neonates.